Dingus Khan is a pun on the name of historical marauder Genghis Khan, most famous for his Mongol horde (no, not Frank Turner’s terrible hardcore band) and prolific sexual activity – it’s thought that Khan fathered so many children that he may be humanity’s nearest common ancestor. Dingus Khan are also capable of procreating a large number, boasting eight members, including three bassists and three drummers (well, one drummer and two “percussionists”). The Essex rabble originally released debut album ‘Support Mistley Swans’ back in October 2012, and it gets an extended re-release here for the digital market.
It’s hard to know what the point of this record is. With as many members as they have, the band obviously seek to make as much of a baffling din as possible – in this, they have succeeded, but you have to wonder just one thing – why? Ostensibly, Dingus Khan are a slacker rock band, akin to Blur circa ’97, Pavement and Stagecoach, but wrap it in an impenetrable layer of unnecessary noise and confusion, the end result being disorientating and shambolic chaos. The band lurch their way through this album, chucking a three-chord punk riff here, the sound of a man crying there, and gales of white noise all over the place – I’m sure they want to be seen as “unpredictable” and “anarchic”, but this is directionless, witless tosh.
It’s not only the music that’s dreadful, the lyrics are also astonishingly appalling; take this gem for example – “Bought a Bag For Life and it broke in the shop, tried to give blood but my blood wasn’t good enough, need more iron” – truly life-altering stuff. However, mundane lines like these are delivered without a single hint of irony, leading one to believe they take being shit very seriously indeed. Who the audience might be for this is a complete mystery, which is presumably why it’s been re-released just 7 months after it originally came out – this sounds like drunken pub karaoke shouted over a jam session from the cast of Stomp – if this is appealing to you, you probably don’t deserve ears.
A grasping release from a once prestigious indie label now fallen on harder times, Fierce Panda, ‘Support Mistley Swans’ fails to attain a single iota of sense, and if it was heard by more than a handful of people, would richly deserve a place in the annuals as one of the most unlistenable things put to record Dingus? More like Saveus, from this horrible turd of an album.
‘Support Mistley Swans’ by Dingus Khan is out now on Fierce Panda.
Words by Ollie Connors (@olliexcore)